Archive for October, 2009
12 Unusual Swimming Pools – Toxel
Knight Rider – Fashionably Geek
My first Rub and Tug – Bikeguide
So, I’m contemplating going to this “adult massage joint” a few blocks from my house, but I have a few issues I need to iron out first, seeing as it will be my first time going to one.
1. If I walk in and all the women look like a bag of rusty ski-doo parts, is it disrespectful to just peace the fuck out?
2. Should I strike up a conversation with the woman or just point to my junk and lay down? I don’t want to pay extra for unnessesary chit chat.
3. Should I bring a condom?
4. Is it rude to ask her to wash her hands before she touches me? After all, it’s technically gay if she rubs off some dude and smears that filth all over me. Fuck that.
5. Do I have to sign some sort of legal document stating that the Massage Studio will not be held responsible if I get aids? And can they take legal action on me if I give one of them herpies?
6. If she’s into it, and I know she will be, is it frowned upon to bone the rub and tugger? Seems kind of skuzzy..
7. Should I shit, shower, shave and treat this like a date before I go? Or can I just skip the shower, rep the pubic jungle, and shit at the massage joint before she rubs one off me?
8. Okay, lets say my penis listens to music. It would prefer the “metal genre” because it likes the excessive BPM. If shes yanking too slow, can I tell her to increase my BPM because my wiener is a metal head?
9. Can I haggle the price on the factors of age, weight, and preformance?
10. Is it rude to ask her to make me a sandwich before I leave?
This woman beats off men for a living, so I’m guessing she’ll have a pretty stong forearm which means she’ll have my junk in a death grip and could possibly rip it right off if I say the wrong thing. What things should I avoid doing/saying because as funny as it sounds, I do not want to walk out with my dick in my hand.
The 9 Greatest Reused action figures – Topless Robot
The GTA BMX scene has suffered from a tremendous blow this year with what the park formerly know as “The Warehouse” falling under new ownership. The news came down via facebook from Jamie Burke who has been down with the park from the beginning, I’ve transcript ed some of his originally message below:
“it truly hurts me to have to inform you that the warehouse is closed(to bikes) this season(or forever, who knows.)….i found out that i was in competition with some skateboarders so i was rushing to close the deal and open the park….. was dicked around with alot and he ended up renting the warehouse to the other people.”
Loosing The Warehouse is much more than just losing an indoor riding spot. There are a few other places to ride indoors in the area (with a new one on the horizon) some of which have just as many ramps (or more) than the warehouse with cleaner bathrooms and air quality. But that’s not the point, losing The Warehouse is more akin to losing a club house. This private/semi private park was the central hub for riders all over Ontario.
Every time I went to The Warehouse I knew at least 5 other riders, which is not something that I can say about the outdoor park closest to me let alone other indoor spots in the area.
For me a lot of the time going to The Warehouse wasn’t even so much about the riding as it was about being around your friends, friends you don’t really get a chance to see all summer due to conflicting schedules and different local spots. The vibes were always positive at the warehouse and I rarely witnessed any sort of beef.
The riding level was always super high but it never gave off that competitive vibe that can happen at some parks. I learned a lot of new tricks at the warehouse and have to attribute a lot of my growth as a ramp rider to that park. The Warehouse helped push our scene to notable heights. Every scene needs a place like this and now our scene is lacking it.
Rumor has it that the place that bought The Warehouse may have a bike night here and there, which while the intentions are good, probably won’t work out to well. The Warehouse being the size that it is and the setup the way it is gets crazy with high capacity. On Jam nights if you are not a local its tough to judge the flow of the place and to know when to drop in and therefore really easy to ball up the entire flow of the park. Having a solitary bike night every few weeks will draw a similar if not larger amount of riders (at first) which will just lead to frustration when dealing with the increased numbers.
The bike nights also won’t have the same atmosphere traditional Warehouse jams had myself and some of my good friends have celebrated our birthdays riding at The Warehouse, Jams were always sponsored and occasionally a few pros would stop by as well (or people from way out of town).
Our scene was lucky to have The Warehouse for as long as we did and I don’t think any of us ever took it for granted. RIP The Warehouse you will be missed.
Here are some of the videos over the past two years of past two years at The Warehouse:
Do want this